That Girl in the Library

I was at the library today, planning a bridal shower with a friend, when an old man interrupted our conversation. He said, "Excuse me, but I've been listening to you for quite some time now, and it sounds like you were talking about the universe. It sounded interesting. But, I couldn't hear everything that you were saying."

I smiled and said, "Oh no sir. Nothing as exciting as the universe. Just a wedding shower."

Thinking we were done, I began to turn away, and heard him say, "Now, I've been wondering about that. It seems to me that there is only one reason we are in weddings -- It is so we know we have friends."

I shifted in my chair so I could square off with him and I looked in his eyes as he talked. He was lonely. From his sunken eyes to his stutter, he was all alone. He mused about the money we spend to prove we have friends. That maybe the bride should pay for everything. Better yet, we should all come as we are to show acknowledgment. But, we should wait to celebrate until a couple reaches 20 years. He rambled on topic for a bit before saying he could be wrong and asked me if I agreed. I said if it were me, I would have a celebration of the joining of two families and focus on the marriage, not the wedding.

He got an eerie all-knowing look in his smile and proceeded to tell me about my life. How someday soon I'll fall in love and have an outlandish wedding. How on holidays I'll stop by my side of the family quickly on the way to my in-laws. Because the in-laws will be the 'correct' side of the family. How my parents will ask why I don't come over and I'll be too nice to tell them the truth--that though they raised me, they're a bunch of jerks. He said that all that won't be important though, because I don't know the answer to the most important thing in life. I don't know where I'm going when I leave... The library had to close and flustered, he stood, adjusted his cap and walked out.

And, I didn't bother to tell him that in telling me who I am, he forgot to ask me. I didn't tell him that when he put me into a hole, he put me in the wrong hole. But I don't think that was really important today. Because, as he goes home to an empty house, and has his ritual nightcap, I like to think that he'll go to bed a little less lonely. Because he knows a sweet, naive girl from the library.

Contributed by Catie.

Say Say Oh Playmate

I spent time at the Science Museum today and my heart was happy when I stopped focusing on the exhibit around me and watched the people instead. Playing on the ground near me, were three people with hand puppets: two little girls of different races and an adult who appeared to be their nanny. They each were wearing a doll of a different race on their hands.

One doll was named Molly and Molly wanted to join as the others were playing the sing-song hand-clap game of 'Say Say Oh Playmate.' And as these little voices sang "... and we'll be jolly friends, forever more...," I was happy. Because these little girls will grow up in a future where they are not scared of racial differences. And maybe they didn't learn anything new from the stats and facts of the RACE exhibit, but they learned that a Korean, Guatemalan, and Kenyan can all be jolly friends.

Contributed by Catie.

Experiment

This winter, my students were to write essays using a real-life hero as an example of someone who went through the archetypal Hero's Journey. There are 10 steps to this journey, and it was a bit much for some. One of the steps is "the Experience with Unconditional Love."

In grading the final product, I ran across a student who gave an example of love and then said, "which represents the 'experiment with unconditional love.'" I had to correct the name of the step for him—and I crossed out experiment to write in experience. But I cannot help but wonder if he didn't stumble onto something greater.

Maybe each new relationship we enter into is really just a new experiment with love. And we are merely testing the hypothesis that there is within everyone something that is worth loving and that something deserves to be loved unconditionally. And sometimes our experiments fail, and sometimes the results are phenomenal, but all are experiments where we have no way of knowing the end result until we give it a whirl…

Contributed by Catie.

Old Memories

I remembered something beautiful the other day when I was going through old memories:

I watched her walk up to the new bride. And as she gave the new bride a side hug and walked away, she uttered three really plain words: Enjoy your love. And I thought it was beautiful. Partly because she meant it. And partly because I could tell that she was still enjoying her old love.

Contributed by Catie.