It's getting really beautiful, now

I wrote the following on a napkin from a fast food restaurant last April. It also appears in the opening pages of the 2006 Liner, Hamline University's yearbook.

"It's getting really beautiful, now." I say that to myself whenever things start to fall apart. Like a mantra with the intake of every breath.

In the slipping of one moment into the next, in the dissolution of present circumstance, the shards of what I hoped mattered glimmer. With a new start, there I am in them. A thousand little parts, each image still unmistakably me.

I could gather them up, build something and cast a shadow. But there's something worth noting right now. It compels me to stand still, breathe, and let the pieces rest undisturbed for a few moments longer.